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kids

wtf
Ok, for all you parents out there... (bio parents, that is.  LOL)

After less than 24 hours alone with my 8 year old niece....  Yikes.   You all have my respect.  Or sympathy, I havent decided yet.  Shes been really good too, but... hard to be yourself with kids around.

Anyway, just had to say.  Props to the parents!

Merry Christmas Everyone! :)

binky


Not a creature was stirring, not even the visiting pugs....



overwhelmed

overalls
My little big Sissy says she's overwhelmed.  Not in an "I need to get out of here" way, but just awash in feelings stronger than what she is accustomed to.   And she isnt the only one feeling overwhelmed.  Mommy and I are swimming in a sea of yummies ourselves.  To be fair to dear little S, Mommy and I have been spoiling each other silly for nine years.  We have some idea of what to expect.  But my poor lil Sissy...  She may not be ready.

But she'll have fun.  Promise.  :)

But Mommy and I do share her sentiment in some regards.  We are both still taken aback by how much we enjoy having her in our life, and by how our feelings for her deepen our feelings for each other.  Its just a wonderful, fulfilling, optimism-inspiring adventure we are on.  That time and fate has allowed us to share christmastime is just icing on the cake.  But Mommy and I do love icing, so we are indulging.

And because I know she will read this, remember...  We arent just doing all this for you.  We are doing it because we want to and we are very very very much loving every second of it.  :)

Merry Christmastime everyone!  I wish all of you might feel the bliss we feel in our kinky little family this season.

Is this a dream???

flm


*rubbing my eyes, expecting to wake up*

HAPPY!!!!!!  :)


  



the most wonderful time of the year...

brosis
There is something extra special about christmastime this year.  Mommy and I have extended our special little circle, and including S in our plans has super-charged our xmas spirit.  We are both flying on mistletoe clouds right now, and couldnt be happier.

There is an extra stocking above the mantle, and presents for someone other than Mommy and I piling up under the tree.  We usually have several days of christmas anyway (one for family, one for us, one for friends), but the extra present session in the works this year is making us both giddy.

Yay!!!

Pictures with presents coming soon.  *giggle*

Its Snow Big Deal

indig
Snow is sooooo pretty when you watch it fall from inside a warm home.

Its kinda depressing when you see it falling but are stuck at work, and have nothing to look forward to but trudging through the flakes and slush and slop to get home.

Wow, I really *am* in a cranky mood today.  Oh well.  Tomorrow is Friday.  And vacation.  Maybe Im just on hold...

The Red Violin

flm
Happiness.  Contentment.  Bliss.

We all want it, crave it.  Underneath, it's all thats really important.

So what happens when you find it?

Nice problem to have, right?  Im not by any means saying it isn’t an enviable position to be in.  Im just contemplating how it alters one's perspective on the world.  Because it does.  It really does.  Have you ever seen the movie the Red Violin?  Its about a treasure that travels through the centuries, through the hands of people who actually understand its worth, and yet it continues to move.  It’s the ultimate prize.  And Samuel L. Jackson finds it.  But that’s not really the point. 

What do you do when you find exactly what you most wanted?

Its a doosey.  The sentiment is about as close to how I feel about Mommy as I’ve heard expressed.  You’ve found a treasure.  Something that makes you tingle from head to toe.  You find exactly what was missing from your life.  You claim it.  You proclaim your attachment and devotion.  And then…

What?

I find myself wanting to hold on as tight as I can.  I feel that’s very natural.  Wouldn’t anyone hold on to something they value?  But with a person, with a relationship, holding on to someone like they are a treasure doesn’t work.  Even in the kinkiest, deepest power exchange scenarios, you cant really objectify someone.  You cant lock them away in a vault.  Time passes, things change, and no matter how much you might try to control things enough and prepare and plan for all possibilities, life still happens.  People change, people evolve.  Situations arise.  Relationships change. 

But the question still remains.  Even knowing this, accepting this, how do you proceed?  You still feel the exhilaration that makes the prize so valuable.  Its very tempting to do what you think you can to hold on to things when they are good.  When I find something I like, I want to do it every day.  (those of you who know me personally don’t need me to tell you this)  But as much as I think that will keep me happy, it never will.  Because relationships die when they become stagnant.  That’s the line in the sand.  Even if they peak at unbelievable heights, they need to grow, or they die. 

And that’s what makes love so scary.  The moment you find it, you fear losing it.  And that fear is what turns love so ugly so easily.  It takes a lot to entrust feelings like that to someone.  And that’s really what devotion is all about.  Trust.  Trust that you will take care of each other no matter what.  No matter what.  Even the unthinkable.  Even if things are different in the future than they are now.

It *is* scary.

My solution?  I cant say it would work for anyone else, but I just try to hold her hand as we go through our journeys.  My attachment is to her, in whatever she does, wherever she travels, whatever paths she takes.  I hope that I stay desirable enough to warrant the standing I have in her life at the moment, but I cant just expect it happen.  I cant expect her to stop being.  I have to walk with her.  I have to keep up.  And I have to let go.

You cant hold on to a treasure.  You can only try to stay close to it.  Even if it means everything to you.

Especially then.  :)

And, of course, shower your treasure with affection and love. 


*******

Mommy and Sissy and me have stumbled upon this sort of situation.  Its past the too good to be true stage.  For me, and I can only speak for myself here, Im in a new phase.  Im so happy, Im wary of over-watering the plant.  My urges are to do as much as we all can as soon as possible and as often as possible.  I want it all.  Now.  And its not just a lack of patience at play.  My affection and desires are manifestations of my feelings.  I want to *act* to make sure things are great and that everyone is happy.  Not that anything is really wrong with that, but smothering can turn to suffocating without proper care.  Maybe thats why a little boy doesnt make the decisions or the rules.   That’s where balance comes in, and balance is, as most things, much better mastered by girls.

Of course thats just the opinion of a little one whose diaper is in dire need of changing.  I might not be right.  *giggle*

POUT!

flm
Waaaaaaa!!!  *stomping feet*   I don wanna!  I don wanna!

*sigh*

Homework sucks.  How dare they?  How *dare* they???  How dare those children expect me to correct their silly crap when I could be playing with Mommy???

grrrrr.

Oh well.  Thats why Im not writing something interesting.  Instead, Im worrying about how to make european imperialism interesting, finding a way to spend time on the new deal without vomiting, and book keeping.  Fun.

I do suppose its a small price to pay for the gloriously fun life Im living these days, but...  Im still going to bitch.

Its just my way.   *giggle*


Hugs to everyone who matters...  :)

I spy...

brosis
Two bibs hanging in the family room.  A pink one and a blue one.  *giggle* 

I'm in such a good mood...

Long time listener, first time caller...

flm
Yeah, so...  Never done this.  Kinda feels weird.  Are you looking at me?  Why is that guy looking at me?  Why are you reading this?  Do I know you?  How did you find me?  I want answers dammit!

No, not paranoid.  Just untrusting.  Thats not the same thing is it?

So Im on here due to one special girl, and believe it or not, it isnt Mommy.  (Not that Mommy isnt involved...I mean she is...she very much is, Im just saying...  Oh forget it.)  But yeah, Im here because someone Im fond of hangs around these parts.  Not sure how much Im actually going to write, but we'll see.  I do love the sound of my own voice.

Anyway, hello LiveJournal world!  *waves*  I'm william.

Now stop looking at me.  :P